Africa

I am in a place between lands, worlds, and people. I am not living in any one place, I am staying there. I am not homeless in the sense that I have no roof on my head; I am homeless in the sense that I have no home. I do not belong anywhere.

I search in other lands, with other people, changing them like outfits to see which one is just right. I am 20. I am young, and have plenty of time to search. Yet I am weary, and tired.

I found it once, and it was taken away from me.

The solution was easy; return to the motherland. By this I mean Africa. The origin of man. Sterkfontein. Let's start close to there and move onwards, find a home to have a child and die. This is life, isn't it? Spend a lifetime searching for something that you finally realise doesn't exist.
My belief is eternal. I will be an exception to the rule.

I am reluctant to join the life of a student. I am not a student, not anymore. Perhaps I can find a friend.

I just want to feel that earth in between my fingers and the heat of the dry sun on my skin and sit. I just want to be content and forget for a while.

That is it.

Are you still a nice guy, or have you become a bitter asshole?

So I've seen a lot of posts of 9gag, facebook, and other social networking sites about 'nice guys finish last' and 'omg wah I've been friendzoned.' I want to make a statement. There is a difference between genuinely nice guys, and nice guys who have turned into bitter assholes, and bitter assholes who are nice just to get tail.

Here's a quiz for you.

Girls only want good looking/rich guys.
a) true
b) false

A girl should 'give it up' to me because I am really really nice to her.
a) true
b) false

All nice guys finish last.
a) true
b) false

Good looking girls are bitches.
a) true
b) false

A girl is misleading me if she is nice to me and then rejects me, making her a bitch.
a) true
b) false

All girls are the same.
a) true
b) false

Girls are more likely to go for douchebag guys than nice guys.
a) true
b) false

If a girl sleeps with my best friend but not me, even though I am much nicer to her, she is a slut.
a) true
b) false

Girls are constantly looking for new men to be with, even if already in a relationship.
a) true
b) false

If a girl is nice to me, it should mean she wants me.
a) true
b) false

If a girl is not responding to me, she is a bitch.
a) true
b) false

If you answered true to more than 3 of these questions, congratulations, you are a bitter asshole.
Have you ever thought girls are not fuck machines that function with kindness coins? Have you ever thought maybe a girl is just not into you, the same way you're not into some other girl?

Fuck you.

Much love.

How IB has fucked me over.

I've mentioned in a few blog posts a few years back that I was enrolled in the IB programme. Well, I managed to graduate with a decent 32 points, which to me was fair considering the amount of effort I didn't put in to my studies, meaning not that this is a low number, but that I personally could have done better. No matter, my point amount has never hindered me. IB has.

You see, I went to university for a bit. I quit because I had a premature mid-life crisis, thing. I got accepted into university with my diploma, and probably will again now that I am applying to UCT (what I mean is, if I don't get in, it won't be because my diploma is not good enough, but for other reasons). So for this, IB is all right. Generally, it is well known in academic spheres and sometimes even respected as what it really is; difficult.

So, let's jump to my first problem.
University in Finland. Universities in Finland do recognise the IB diploma, however I don't think they fully understand it. You see, the IB diploma consists generally of 6, maybe 7, subjects. In Finland, students go through a lot more than 6 courses in their 3 year "high school," so maybe they view this as inferior...especially since the level of education in Finland is pretty much the same as the IB. However, this isn't such a big deal because I don't reeeally want to go to uni in Finland anyway.

Now, my real problem is starting to be work. Since I am between jobs and not enrolled in school yet, I need work. This is already quite difficult, but is made even harder because let's face it, most people have no idea what IB is. To them, it could be a special needs programme. More than once I have been asked what it is, and my prospective employer has told me that "to be honest, I thought it was a special needs programme." I wonder how many jobs opportunities it's ruined for me when no one has actually asked me.

Finally, now that I have to apply for welfare since I can't get a job and am not enrolled in school, it is causing problems for me in that, again, no one knows what the fuck it is.  In my city there is one, tiny school that teaches the IB programme, and that only to a couple dozen students... so it's no wonder no one knows. But now, I've got all the officials wondering what it is and whether it is actually up to the standards of the 'normal' school system. And, since in the IB you can't specialise in a particular field, I don't get the bonus benefits of being "unemployed due to career circumstances."

I think the IB need to add a class that actually has some practical value in the real world. Instead of goddamn TOK, we need a class on life. By this I mean, how to deal with unemployment, how to get a job, how to move, how to do your taxes, how to deal with loss, something about law, basic human right and so on so forth. I mean, even if it was like 1 hour, once a month, a class like that would have really helped me out in my current situation. Now I feel like I really did go to a special needs school, since everyone around me (who went to normal school) was taught in school how to do most of these things.

Goddamnit IB.

Not everyone is a spoilt brat whose peachy life is planned out, and will be supported by their parents till they get their masters degree.




Maybe I am just shifting the blame, finding a scapegoat. But really, it has a small role, don't it?

An introduction to geeky stuff for girls

DISCLAIMER:
Okay, so before I get angry comments below, let me clear something up. YES this post will be slightly sexist. YES this post will assume that some people did not spend their childhood in 'geekdom' but are enthusiastic about joining the fun later in life (no, that is not being a poseur). And YES I know there are girls who like geeky things, and may not particularly like what I mention here. So if you still insist on being nitpicky, fuck you.

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Without further ado, here are a few things you (as a girl, or a guy if you so wish) can get into if you wish to broaden your spectrum into the bright and nerdy, but don't feel like jumping right into 'all that stuff everyone keeps on talking about'.

Sailor Moon: You've probably heard of or watched Sailor Moon before. In a nutshell, it's an anime about a clumsy, obnoxious young girl who turns out to be a sort of superhero from the Moon Kingdom. Even though some parts are painfully obvious, it's actually a very entertaining show, plus it has pretty outfits, fun hair styles, and love dilemmas (even a talking cat!). Even better is that each episode is about 20 minutes long, so it's pretty fast paced. I really recommend Sailor Moon if you want to get into anime. It's a gateway anime.(Yes, I am hilarious). Direction: anime, cosplay (easy, and pretty cosplay)

Pokemon: Pokemon can be a bit hard to get into for girls, and I think the main reason for this is that so many of the main characters are boys (until Misty comes along). As a child I loved watching Pokemon, but now when I watch the episodes again, although entertaining, they can get a bit repetitive. I do recommend it, at least the movies (especially the first 3). But Pokemon, luckily, is not just a show and movies. The best part of it are the games. So get yourself a GameBoy or Nintendo DS and buy a Pokemon game. They're easy to get a hang of and extremely entertaining, you find yourself playing for hours at a time. If you want to hit 2 birds with one stone, you can play the Pokemon game on Nintendo 64, though you run through it much faster. Direction: anime, gaming

Superhero movies: By this, of course, I mean all the Marvel and DC superheroes (for those who don't know: Iron Man, Hulk, Thor, Batman, etc.). The movies are actually all quite entertaining, and at least for me, got me interested in checking out the comic books (I didn't finish more than 3, but they got me interested!). If you want, you can also check out their older versions and compare the actors (personally, I found the older ones quite tedious). However, this is personal. The new movies though are action packed with a lot of attractive people, so you won't get bored... unless you don't like superheroes. HA, preposterous. Direction: superheroes, possibly comics

Harry Potter: Let's be honest, if you haven't seen or read Harry Potter by now, you most likely won't be into it. In this case I recommend you take another direction with your geekdom. But there is a possibility you never got the chance, or you remember seeing it sometime when you were young. You should revisit it, and if you like it, take a gander at the books. They're vastly entertaining, not to mention well written. Unfortunately you've missed the golden period of speculation between the book releases (who will love who? Who is evil?), but it's still worth a try. Like Sailor Moon, Harry Potter is a gateway to other magical worlds like Game of Thrones, and anything by Tolkien. Direction: magic, fantasy

Ragnarok Online 2: If you're into magical kingdoms and gaming by now, it's time to introduce RO2. A lot of people I've spoken to say that RO2 reminds them of World of Warcraft. Now I, personally, have never played WoW, nor do I intend to. But if you're looking to go into that direction, RO2 can be good for you. It's actually a simple role playing game, where you can if you want, play alongside other people, or by yourself. I, for example, am a magician and a blacksmith. You get to find pretty outfits and weapons, and fight against some (actually pretty cute) little creatures to gain combat and job points. The graphics and colours are wonderful, and there are no ugly monsters or gross scenes (at least so far for me). Plus, it's free! Direction: gaming

Okay, that's all from me for now. Once again, if you're feeling peevish, read my disclaimer please, because if your complaint falls under those categories, I will delete it. Fuck freedom of speech, ha.
If you have any questions or want more recommendations, I can help you to a certain extent. I'm no connoisseur, I am just dipping my foot in a very large pool.

People who are hated at airports/aeroplanes

I thought it would be time for one of my rare but fun rants about arseholes all over the world. I recently moved to Finland, and so the experience is fresh in my memory.
So let's talk about people who are hated at airports.  

THE SAUSAGERS
You know the zigzag line to the border control and security? You know how every person has to unload their bags, take off their shoes, and go through the metal detector? You know how the security officers wait at least 15-20 seconds before letting the next person through? Obviously, if you've ever been to an airport you will know this. So, the closer everyone lines up, it does not make it happen any faster. Yet somehow, the people (I call them the Sausagers) insist on practically smelling my shampoo when in the line. I can feel the body heat from you- now that's way too fucking close. Keep it an arms length, then you have time to run the extra metre if you absolutely have to (but you fucking won't because you have to wait and get your goddamn shit in your little fucking basket). Rule is, if you can smell my hair and I can feel the heat from your crotch...too fucking close! Asshole scale: 7/10

THE PISSERS
Okay, so now you're in the plane. I personally always choose the window seat because I only use the bathroom on extremely long flights, and I know I won't need to climb over anyone. Sometimes though, all the window seats are taken and I must sit either in the middle or in the aisle seat. Everyone hates the middle seat so we won't even discuss that. I don't mind the aisle seat either, I get to get out first. But when I am in the aisle or middle seat, and the asshole who took the window seat needs to go to the bathroom every 20 minutes, I get pissed off. That could have been my seat, and you could've gone to the bathroom 20 times in 20 minutes if you wanted! However, no, you want to look out of the window for the first 7.5 minutes and then piss me off for the rest of the flight. Take the aisle seat, pisser. Asshole scale: 9.5/10
There is also the junior variation of this, when parents stick their kids in the window seat, and the kids scream AND need to run off every few minutes. Asshole scale: 10/10

THE BUSINESS ASSHOLE
This is the guy who is constantly on the phone, powerwalking around the airport with his little wheeled luggage, and this "I am so important" look on his face. This is the guy who will ram into you with his wheels while you're taking a leisurely stroll down terminal 1, and then glare at you because he hates his life. Listen fuckhead, unless they are announcing your name "Fuckface, the plane is now waiting for you please report to gate 23," you have no reason to be strutting your misery all over us. Go sit in a bar, shout at your employee there, have a beer, chill out. Hate your wife and boss, not the rest of us. Fuck you. Asshole scale: 4/10

THE INTRUDER
Finally, the intruder. This is the guy who sleeps on your side! You know what I mean. You're watching a film, or reading your book, and sometimes even eating, and you start feeling a pressure on one of your sides. No, you're not having a heartattack. It's the idiot next to you who fell asleep and is now leaning on you. You can't really push them away, what if they wake up? Then you're an asshole and they feel embarrassed. You can't wake them up either, same reason. I always just exaggerate myself, and lean all the way to one side, so when they wake up, they feel shit and won't fall asleep again. Asshole scale: 6/10

Well that's my biggest hates for now. If you know any more, please let me know and I will add them to the list! Over.